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[deaftly]

--shit's supposed to record my voice? Why the fuck would I want to leave a message on this thing anyway? They should know who the fuck they're calling if they're calling me in the first place, and obviously I'm not gonna pick up if I don't like them so...

What do you mean it's already recording?

Comments

[deaftly]

Well yeah, but they wouldn't do that to me!

[preybeforemeals]

...Has it ever occurred to you to try fighting any of your Pokémon, through curiosity? Apparently people seem to get it into their heads to try it once in a while here.

[deaftly]

Why the fuck would you ever do something like that!? These fuckers could destroy your brain if they wanted to! Well, the Malamars could, I don't think the Inkays are that smart... But seriously, that's really fucking dumb, why would you pick a fight with something that can summon fucking thunder from the sky?

[...lightning, Naki...]

No, seriously, I want to know who these dumbfucks are.

[preybeforemeals]

[...You know, he was going to correct Naki on that one until he realized that all the moves have names like "Thunderbolt"...]

Well, I don't think it's picking a fight, amore - I think it's more like sparring than anything.

[deaftly]

[See, he's not actually being that stupid for once in his miserable life!!]

...Oh. I guess sparring could be kind of interesting with something that could easily kill you if it wanted to.

[How does this make it any better???]

[preybeforemeals]

...I'm never really sure how I feel about that, actually - I mean, on the one hand that adds an interesting element, yes, but on the other if it's not killing you that means it's holding back, right? That's a little insulting.

[deaftly]

Well, yeah, but they're on a whole different field than humans. If they don't hold back and they kill you, they'll probably feel bad about it.

[Because they're actually normal. Well, as normal as Pokémon fighting people can get.]

So I guess it could be seen as insulting, but if you just keep dying that's not helping you either, right?

[preybeforemeals]

Maybe.

[He's quiet for a moment; thinking, really.]

I suppose I've just been a bit restless lately - I don't miss the way things were in Tokyo, per se, but all of that would at least be familiar in a way that a lot of things in this world aren't.

[deaftly]

Yeah... I kinda miss it too. Or at least, I really miss murdering people.

[preybeforemeals]

[...Naki, were he anyone else he probably wouldn't have laughed at that, but you know what, here we are.

That does kind of beg the question, though - ]

So would you go back, if given the chance?

[deaftly]

[Naki tips his head a bit at the question, obviously deep in thought.]

Well... I mean, I'd like to go back to being a ghoul. If I could be a ghoul here, that'd be ideal. There really isn't much for me back home though. There's Aogiri and they don't want me, so...

[He trails off with a shrug.]

[preybeforemeals]

[...Ah...]

What do you mean, they don't want you?

[deaftly]

Well, I mean that they don't give a shit about me. I'm not allowed to do anything on my own. It's a pain. I mean it's not like I like most of them either.

[preybeforemeals]

I understand, I think - after all, I'm not exactly everyone's favorite person either.

[To put it gently.]

But you're fine here...? You like it well enough, I mean.

[deaftly]

Yeah, of course! I've got a lot of friends here and the Inkays... it's pretty nice here, but I mean if I was a ghoul things would be better.

[preybeforemeals]

That would mean no more cake, you know.

[And that's entirely facetious, but still.]

[deaftly]

...Ahh--!

[LIKE THIS HADN'T OCCURRED TO HIM???]

N-No more cake...!! Shit, what would I do without cake!?

[preybeforemeals]

[MONSIEUR

MONSIEUR NO]

Ah, that is a bit of a problem, isn't it...now that you've experienced it and everything...

[deaftly]

Oh god, how could I ever go back!? How could I live without cake!?

[SEND HELP, MAN DOWN]

[preybeforemeals]

[YOU ARE SUCH A MESS]

Well, we lived just fine without it before; I'm sure you'd manage, somehow.

[deaftly]

But now that I know the taste, how could I possibly live without it!? Nothing will ever compare!!

[And as usual, Naki looks like he's going to start crying.]

[preybeforemeals]

...You know, I've actually experienced a similar sentiment before - you find ways to work through it, believe me.

Granted, sometimes it's because someone dragged you through it, but the sentiment remains.

[deaftly]

Yeah, I guess that's true. There's no point to be so upset about it, you've just gotta do what you can and move forward, right?

[...He gets the feeling that this isn't talking about cake anymore...]

[preybeforemeals]

[Well, actually he was referring to just kind of going "FUCK IT" with regards to being discerning for a while after the whole Kaneki thing started, because nothing else he did was ever going to live up. :|a So it's not explicitly talking about cake, but it technically is still talking about "this thing I want to eat to the exclusion of literally goddamn everything."

Shuu Tsukiyama: Often not nearly as deep as anyone thinks he is, unless it's by total accident.]

Something like that, I think.

It is good to know you're enjoying yourself here, however.

[deaftly]

[LOOK HE TRIED, HE'S NEVER DOING THIS AGAIN, HIS HEAD HURTS]

Of course! I mean, I'm a little antsy now, but it's not like it's all that bad. It could be a hell of a lot worse!