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FIRST ERRAND ➣ VIDEO / ACTION [GOLDENROD CITY]
[Hey, Team Rocket, how's it going? Has the base been peaceful lately? Because it certainly isn't going to be today. In fact, if you're unfortunate enough to be walking the hallways, you might see a Grunt get tossed into a nearby wall (or you, if you're really unfortunate). Thankfully the poor guy's alright, just a little stunned, but the shrieking that follows implies that this wasn't some sort of horrible Pokémon-related accident.]
Give me some answers, fucker! I don't give a shit about Pokey-mon or whatever the fuck you're talking about!
[The guy doing the shrieking is... actually fairly tiny. He's about 5'8" and doesn't look like he could toss a guy his size down a hallway. He's wearing a white suit and actually looks presentable, if not a bit pissed off.
...Okay, "a bit pissed off" is a horrendous understatement.]
Are you working for the fucking doves? Is this some kind of a fucking joke? If you shitheads think you're going to capture me again--!
[Naki bends down to grab the poor Grunt by the collar, hoisting him up over his head without much difficulty. The Grunt tries to say something, but Naki doesn't even finish his own thought, much less let the Grunt get a word in edgewise. Instead, he turns and tosses the Grunt down the hallway. Again.]
I'll fucking kill you! I'll fucking kill you all!!
[...Someone please save that poor Grunt.]
[Well, it's almost a day later and it seems someone has finally managed to get Naki to sit down and listen to reason. Somehow. Now that Naki isn't in the base anymore, he's actually much calmer. The video doesn't reveal much in terms of background and is shot from a low angle, revealing the sky and... not much else. Naki is standing, leaning in a bit to look at the camera, and holding a Magikarp by the tail. He shakes the fish at the camera and glares into it accusingly.]
This thing sucks.
[...Thank you, Naki. Surely no one has figured that one out.]
What's the point of Splash? It doesn't do anything. That's all this useless thing knows.
[The Magikarp flops around a bit at the word "useless", like it's responding to being called by name. Naki looks disgusted and shakes the fish before dropping it unceremoniously to the ground. The camera follows the fish before turning back up to face Naki.]
Where do I get something good? If these things are our only weapons here, I want something powerful.
[Did you just miss the part about training Pokémon to make them stronger, or...?]
Oh, if anyone's got any information about getting home, that would be great too. I just got here so I'm still trying to figure this place out.
[...]
And what is with this stupid music?
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All the time.
It snowed in June one day, there was a hurricane with sharks in August, and then this month it seems like every day a new creature shows up here that no one has heard of or seen before.
[He's being honest but he's got that tone of his that makes it seem like he's not taking the question seriously.]
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[Too bad he doesn't have the reference for Sharknado...]
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Good question! I'm more impressed that none of the sharks were hurt.
[Greed....]
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[...Naki, sit down.]
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Come to think of it, I'm not sure where they went after the hurricane.... back into the ocean, I guess?
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[...]
Wait, don't they need water to live!? They would've died before they reached the ocean!!
[Someone stop this man.]
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I didn't see any of them dying.
Your fish is out of the water and just fine, isn't it?
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Shit, should I put it in the water!?
[He doesn't wait for an answer, instead he reaches out to grab the fish, then swings around and throws said fish into the water behind him. At least he's on one of the routes outside of Goldenrod so there is water there, but that poor fish looks like it would rather be on land judging from how badly it's floundering.]
There! Now there's no need to worry!
[...Naki, you're an idiot.]
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Um.
[Hope...fully it evolves into a nice Gyarados and there isn't any horrible situation where it turns on him for being an idiot?]
I don't think it particularly needed that, but okay.
[......this is someone he's not exactly inclined to leave alone and that's saying something because he let Kimbley do whatever the hell he wanted.]
You said you were in Goldenrod?
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[SOMEONE SAVE THIS MAN FROM HIMSELF]
It's a big city with a huge uh... what did they call it... Pokey-mart? Oh, there's a casino here too!
[That might be a bit more memorable than a Pokémart.]
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Greed's going to regret this immediately, but]
.....yeah, you're in Goldenrod.
That's where I live.
[Which he's saying mostly because now he's going to want to keep an eye on Naki so he doesn't hurt himself.]
I should be back at the end of next week.
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[Sorry, Greed, you're going to have to be more obvious than that.]
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[Yes you do, Naki. It's a miracle you haven't been arrested already. You've been here one day.]
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Sure. Have fun.
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What the fuck is that look for!?
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...I guess I wouldn't mind hearing more about your experiences with this place. If you wanna meet up when you get back, or whatever.
[But he totally doesn't need a babysitter!!]
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...try not to hurt yourself before next Friday.
[He's pretty sure Naki is going to get in trouble anyway, however.]
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[THAT'S HIGHLY LIKELY...]
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[Did we really go the entire conversation without noticing the shark teeth.....]