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Sep. 21st, 2020 12:47 amHMD | OPT OUT
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FOURTH ERRAND ➣ VIDEO
Oct. 20th, 2015 03:34 amOkay, so there are a fuckton of messed up Pokémon running around, but I've got the winner right here.
[The video opens on a... well.]
I'm calling it a Munchkrow. It's the best fucking name ever.
[Well, it would be better if it was a Munchlax and a Honchkrow fusion, but it's not. Instead it has the body and tail of a Honchkrow, but it's sporting the head, wings, and legs of a Murkrow. It's exactly as ridiculous as it sounds. It's currently hopping uselessly in the grass (presumably just outside Goldenrod, if the city in the background looks familiar at this time of night/morning) and it's making awful squawking noises. It's kind of pathetic, honestly.]
Look at this fucker. Are you seeing this? You'd think whatever the fuck's smashing Pokémon together to create these fucking abominations would choose two different Pokémon. I'm gonna catch this one, it's so fucking stupid.
[An Ultra Ball appears in the frame, smacking the Munchkrow in the head. The bird turns with an indignant noise that sounds more like a shriek than a squawk, and immediately launches itself at Naki and the 'Gear. The 'Gear lands in the grass, so you get a lovely view of the night sky as Naki screams. You'll see a few feathers flying upwards because apparently the correct response to dealing with a bird attacking you is to beat the shit out of it.]
Son of a fucking bitch, I'll kill you! What the fuck's wrong with you!?
[A Malamar appears in the frame and shakes her head before turning the 'Gear off. Why do Naki's posts always end with him getting attacked by something?]
[The video opens on a... well.]
I'm calling it a Munchkrow. It's the best fucking name ever.
[Well, it would be better if it was a Munchlax and a Honchkrow fusion, but it's not. Instead it has the body and tail of a Honchkrow, but it's sporting the head, wings, and legs of a Murkrow. It's exactly as ridiculous as it sounds. It's currently hopping uselessly in the grass (presumably just outside Goldenrod, if the city in the background looks familiar at this time of night/morning) and it's making awful squawking noises. It's kind of pathetic, honestly.]
Look at this fucker. Are you seeing this? You'd think whatever the fuck's smashing Pokémon together to create these fucking abominations would choose two different Pokémon. I'm gonna catch this one, it's so fucking stupid.
[An Ultra Ball appears in the frame, smacking the Munchkrow in the head. The bird turns with an indignant noise that sounds more like a shriek than a squawk, and immediately launches itself at Naki and the 'Gear. The 'Gear lands in the grass, so you get a lovely view of the night sky as Naki screams. You'll see a few feathers flying upwards because apparently the correct response to dealing with a bird attacking you is to beat the shit out of it.]
Son of a fucking bitch, I'll kill you! What the fuck's wrong with you!?
[A Malamar appears in the frame and shakes her head before turning the 'Gear off. Why do Naki's posts always end with him getting attacked by something?]
THIRD ERRAND ➣ VIDEO
Aug. 20th, 2015 11:05 amOkay, so. I think I might've made a mistake.
[It's been awhile since Naki popped up on the network so he's probably been busy doing something useful, right?? He's wearing a black suit today as opposed to the usual white, but more importantly he's parked on the floor of what looks like a very large empty room. Some of you might recognize it as the interior of one of those large houses you can rent in Goldenrod, though Naki obviously hasn't furnished the place at all yet.]
I always wanted to get my own place but I think I went a little overboard. There's no fucking way I can handle a house this big on my own. So what am I supposed to do? I'm not giving this place up - I worked fucking hard to earn enough money to afford it for awhile!
[He gestures to the room behind him and the camera pans to survey it. Yep. It's big and pretty empty. It looks like it's gathering dust already. How the hell did Naki even manage that?]
I tried teaching the squid army how to clean but they're fucking useless.
[A chirp from somewhere off-screen gets Naki's attention and he makes a face.]
Fucking useless, yeah that's right, I fucking went there. You guys can use fucking forks and you can't even use a feather duster? Don't pull that bullshit on me, I know you're just lazy little shits--
[And that's about when he gets tackled by squids. There are the usual six and then-- oh god they just keep coming. How many squids has this man hatched in the past few months??]
Gah! Get off, you fucking assholes-- Shit, no, Octo, please!
[And then a Malamar bodyslams into him and the feed ends. Never mind, it seems like Naki's continuing to be an idiot.]
[It's been awhile since Naki popped up on the network so he's probably been busy doing something useful, right?? He's wearing a black suit today as opposed to the usual white, but more importantly he's parked on the floor of what looks like a very large empty room. Some of you might recognize it as the interior of one of those large houses you can rent in Goldenrod, though Naki obviously hasn't furnished the place at all yet.]
I always wanted to get my own place but I think I went a little overboard. There's no fucking way I can handle a house this big on my own. So what am I supposed to do? I'm not giving this place up - I worked fucking hard to earn enough money to afford it for awhile!
[He gestures to the room behind him and the camera pans to survey it. Yep. It's big and pretty empty. It looks like it's gathering dust already. How the hell did Naki even manage that?]
I tried teaching the squid army how to clean but they're fucking useless.
[A chirp from somewhere off-screen gets Naki's attention and he makes a face.]
Fucking useless, yeah that's right, I fucking went there. You guys can use fucking forks and you can't even use a feather duster? Don't pull that bullshit on me, I know you're just lazy little shits--
[And that's about when he gets tackled by squids. There are the usual six and then-- oh god they just keep coming. How many squids has this man hatched in the past few months??]
Gah! Get off, you fucking assholes-- Shit, no, Octo, please!
[And then a Malamar bodyslams into him and the feed ends. Never mind, it seems like Naki's continuing to be an idiot.]
SECOND ERRAND ➣ VIDEO
Feb. 6th, 2015 04:00 pm[Normally Naki wouldn't bother posting a video to the whole network about something like this, but he's been trapped inside for far too long due to the hail and he's bored. So here we are.
The room behind Naki is exceptionally plain, without any sort of interesting features at all. Naki is slightly more interesting, if only because he's leering at the 'Gear in a way that definitely can't mean anything good. He's wearing the usual suit and overall there's nothing different about him. The interesting part of the video are the six Inkays at his feet. That's right. Six. Oh wait, one of them has a serious case of Ditto-face, but the other five look like normal Inkays.]
Alright, listen up! I'm going to show you guys something really fucking cool!
[And with that, Naki pulls out a bottle. It really isn't all that remarkable, but he turns it to reveal a cute Inkay sticker in the middle.]
This is an Inkay Bottle. I guess it's not as common knowledge as I thought it was, but this is how you evolve these fuckers!
[He nudges one of the Inkays with his foot, not hard enough to hurt it. It squeaks in response.]
So! Today I'm gonna evolve these things!
[He reaches down and picks up the Ditto-faced one, apparently not realizing that it's in fact a Ditto, then pops open the bottle and proceeds to stuff the Ditto-squid inside. That bottle really doesn't look big enough for a squid to fit into, but here we go.]
Okay, so once you've got 'em inside, then you turn it around like so-- [Naki spins the bottle around a few times and pops off the lid.] --And here we go--!
[...Well, whatever he was expecting, it wasn't a blue Ditto oozing out of the bottle and falling into a very dizzy puddle on the ground.]
What the fuck-- Goddammit, Copy!! I told you to sit over there, out of the way! Fucking hell, you've ruined everything!
[Naki proceeds to reach down and grab the poor Pokémon, only for it to try to wriggle free. One of the five Inkays apparently decides that this is enough stupid for one day and reaches up to turn off the 'Gear.]
The room behind Naki is exceptionally plain, without any sort of interesting features at all. Naki is slightly more interesting, if only because he's leering at the 'Gear in a way that definitely can't mean anything good. He's wearing the usual suit and overall there's nothing different about him. The interesting part of the video are the six Inkays at his feet. That's right. Six. Oh wait, one of them has a serious case of Ditto-face, but the other five look like normal Inkays.]
Alright, listen up! I'm going to show you guys something really fucking cool!
[And with that, Naki pulls out a bottle. It really isn't all that remarkable, but he turns it to reveal a cute Inkay sticker in the middle.]
This is an Inkay Bottle. I guess it's not as common knowledge as I thought it was, but this is how you evolve these fuckers!
[He nudges one of the Inkays with his foot, not hard enough to hurt it. It squeaks in response.]
So! Today I'm gonna evolve these things!
[He reaches down and picks up the Ditto-faced one, apparently not realizing that it's in fact a Ditto, then pops open the bottle and proceeds to stuff the Ditto-squid inside. That bottle really doesn't look big enough for a squid to fit into, but here we go.]
Okay, so once you've got 'em inside, then you turn it around like so-- [Naki spins the bottle around a few times and pops off the lid.] --And here we go--!
[...Well, whatever he was expecting, it wasn't a blue Ditto oozing out of the bottle and falling into a very dizzy puddle on the ground.]
What the fuck-- Goddammit, Copy!! I told you to sit over there, out of the way! Fucking hell, you've ruined everything!
[Naki proceeds to reach down and grab the poor Pokémon, only for it to try to wriggle free. One of the five Inkays apparently decides that this is enough stupid for one day and reaches up to turn off the 'Gear.]
( Sit down, Naki. )
[Well, it's almost a day later and it seems someone has finally managed to get Naki to sit down and listen to reason. Somehow. Now that Naki isn't in the base anymore, he's actually much calmer. The video doesn't reveal much in terms of background and is shot from a low angle, revealing the sky and... not much else. Naki is standing, leaning in a bit to look at the camera, and holding a Magikarp by the tail. He shakes the fish at the camera and glares into it accusingly.]
This thing sucks.
[...Thank you, Naki. Surely no one has figured that one out.]
What's the point of Splash? It doesn't do anything. That's all this useless thing knows.
[The Magikarp flops around a bit at the word "useless", like it's responding to being called by name. Naki looks disgusted and shakes the fish before dropping it unceremoniously to the ground. The camera follows the fish before turning back up to face Naki.]
Where do I get something good? If these things are our only weapons here, I want something powerful.
[Did you just miss the part about training Pokémon to make them stronger, or...?]
Oh, if anyone's got any information about getting home, that would be great too. I just got here so I'm still trying to figure this place out.
[...]
And what is with this stupid music?
IC CONTACT
Sep. 22nd, 2014 03:13 amWhat do you mean it's already recording?
Let's not beat around the bush here, Naki is an awful person. There are quite a few things he could potentially bring up in conversation that are equally awful. If you would like to avoid tagging with Naki (and having him tag you), please fill out the following form! I definitely understand wanting to avoid a character like this, so please feel free to make use of it!
Things Naki may bring up:
Like I said, fill out the following form and I won't tag any of the characters you list! Obviously you don't need to go into details, and if you'd rather not tag Naki for a reason not listed, you don't have to elaborate on that either (unless you feel I should know). All comments are screened!
Things Naki may bring up:
- - Cannibalism. Naki is a ghoul, a species that looks humanoid but can only eat humans. He isn't inclined to bring this up in most conversations, but he's also very dumb so he might accidentally hint at it here and there. I will avoid this one entirely and will only bring it up if I've contacted you while we're threading. I will never go into gory details with this.
- Torture. Naki is both a sadist and has been tortured in the past. He's less inclined to bring up his own experiences, but he may bring up his sadistic tendencies if he feels the other character needs to know. "Needs to know" is pretty subjective obviously.
- Spoilers. Since he's from chapter 104, Naki does come with some spoilers for Tokyo Ghoul. Thankfully he doesn't have IC knowledge of most of the spoilers, but if you'd rather avoid tagging him because you're interested in reading Tokyo Ghoul, then please let me know!
Like I said, fill out the following form and I won't tag any of the characters you list! Obviously you don't need to go into details, and if you'd rather not tag Naki for a reason not listed, you don't have to elaborate on that either (unless you feel I should know). All comments are screened!